3: GREATLY EXAGGERATED
--Decepticon Broadcasting Network HQ--
"Are we ready to roll, fellas?"
"Uh, hang on." Viewfinder morphed into robot mode and took a step back, appraising the positions of his fellow Photons Spectro and Spyglass. He then gave a thumbs up as he returned to his camera form. "We're good."
Zoom Out nodded before quickly putting on a cheeky grin as the trio of cameras turned on. "Greetings, fellow Decepticons! You are watching DBN, the one and only Decepticon news network. Really. All the others were shut down!"
He paused for Flash Sentry to play the canned laughter before continuing.
"I am your host, Zoom Out of Triax, and boy do I have a bombshell to drop on you today...."
--The Weak Anthropic Principle--
"Megatron is alive."
The five Scavengers -- and Spacewarp -- all stared at the viewscreen as Zoom Out continued on with his report. Fulcrum and Misfire's mouths were agape, Crankcase was scowling, Krok and Spacewarp had their arms folded, and Spinister... was staring at the ceiling.
"Yes, believe it or not, our glorious leader has returned from the grave," Zoom Out went on. "Nobody knows how exactly this is possible but, hey, I'm not complaining. Anyone's better than Starscream, am I right?"
Crankcase raised a finger. "Wait, didn't he write that book In Starscream We Trust?"
Fulcrum shushed him, his optics glued to the screen.
"Speaking of which," Zoom Out was saying, "according to those present in the Hall of Heroes, where our favorite screeching Seeker was holding a celebration for his seven month anniversary as Decepticon leader, Megatron allegedly 'crashed' the part and made short work of Starscream."
At this, the scene changed to show two mechs, both done up to look like Megatron and Starscream respectively, standing on a crudely-made stage. The Megatron actor had their cobbled-looking "fusion cannon" aimed at the Starscream imposter.
"Who disrupts my celebration?" the latter screeched.
"Celebration, Starscream?" Not-Megatron responded woodenly. "This is bad comedy."
"Megatron, is that you?"
"Here's a hint." Not-Megatron mimicked firing his cannon and Not-Starscream responded by screaming out in faux pain, falling to his knees in an over-dramatic fashion. At that point, the cameras returned to Zoom Out, who had a look of embarrassment on his face.
"Um, yes. As you can see, Megatron is, er, definitely not happy about the current state of his empire. But I'm sure with him back in command, things will get back to--"
Without warning, Krok grabbed the remote control from Fulcrum and turned the viewscreen off.
"Hey!" Misfire protested. "It was just getting good!"
"What difference does any of this make?" Krok muttered. "This does not in anyway affect how we operate, how we live."
"So? Who says it has to? I just wanted to see Megs beat up 'Screamer again."
"Don't you already have that compilation video Wiretap gave you?" Fulcrum asked.
"Yeah, but it only goes up to Cycle 8962. It doesn't even include the Mekhos beatdown, which was by far the best one of that cycle!"
Krok simply grunted as he turned and walked away, tossing the remote aside as he left. The other Scavengers sat in awkward silence until Spacewarp cleared her throat.
"We should probably get going. Agonizer closes his place in three hours."
"You really think he'll give us a hundred grand for a transformation cog?" Fulcrum asked.
"Once we show him it's the T-cog of Amalgamous frikkin' Prime, he will!" Misfire said.
"I still think we should throw in the Requiem Blaster with it," Crankcase muttered.
"I'd rather hold off until we find someone who can offer us more," Spacewarp said. "Agonizer can be stingy, even for items like these."
"I'd rather hold off until we find someone who can offer us more," Spacewarp said. "Agonizer can be stingy, even for items like these."
"We could just shoot him and take his money," Spinister suggested.
Spacewarp rolled her optics. "I'd rather not be an outlaw, thank you very much."
Spinister grunted. "Wuss."
--Deathsaurus' Warworld--
Tarn stared at the blank viewscreen, his masked face unreadable.
The other members of the D.J.D., as well as Deathsaurus and his entire crew, watched him silently, waiting for him to speak.
In his head, the words of the Decepticon newscaster rang, if a bit jumbled. He mainly focused on the keywords, or rather, the only two that mattered:
Megatron. Alive.
Megatron was alive. After six months of being dead, Megatron was suddenly alive.
Glorious. Returned.
This was not possible. How could it be? Megatron had perished with Unicron. There could not have possibly been anything to salvage from it. Not a body, not a spark.
Grave. Better.
No. This was some sort of hoax. This Megatron had to be some sort of impostor; a puppethead to be played by some other power, a power that had seized control of the Decepticons.
Happy. Normal.
Tarn rolled his hands into fists. This had to have been the worst offense he had ever seen -- even worse than Megatron's own "loss of faith." This impostor was tarnishing his Emperor's memory, making a mockery of the Decepticon throne.
All. Hail.
"Tarn?" Moving ever so carefully, Nickel rolled up to him, a look of concern on her small face. "Are you all right?"
Tarn looked down at the Mini-Con, meeting her wide blue optics. Unlike the others, he had always appreciated her overt concern and almost doting personality. And also unlike the others, she always seemed to know what was going on behind his mask.
"Aren't you... aren't you happy?" she asked. "About Megatron being back?"
Tarn did not answer her and instead turned to Deathsaurus, who had his optic ridges raised at him. After a moment, the leader of the Decepticon Justice Division finally spoke.
"Set a course for New Kaon. I wish to meet our reborn leader in person...."
--Decepticon Broadcasting Network HQ-
"Uh, Zoom Out? We're experiencing some interference."
Zoom Out frowned as he looked over to Boom-Stick. "Seriously? Already? I'm not even finished with the first report!"
Boom-Stick's face contorted in consternation as she leaned over to study her monitor. "There seems to be a large... something over our radar."
"A large what? A cloud? A bird? A plane?"
"Try a Decepticon."
Without warning, the ceiling was suddenly torn asunder, filling the stage with Charonian moonlight. Zoom Out's optics widened in horror at the towering blue and white Decepticon that loomed over the DBN newscrew. He was rather surprised with himself that he was even able to speak the terror's name.
"O-Overlord?"
The infamous warlord grinned. "The one and only."
Before he had time to react, Zoom Out suddenly found himself trapped in Overlord's grip as he was brought face to face with the monster.
"Now... what was it you were saying about Megatron?"
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