A comic I made ten years ago.
Date: August 10, 2015
AXIOM NEXUS
Story #1: How Ratchet Got His Hands Back... Again
[first story in this anthology is just an adaptation of James Roberts' unused "Ratchet/Drift hands gag", so I won't be replicating it here]
Story #2: The Dimming Light
Universe: Viron 704.31 Epsilon
Set prior to the events of Shell Game
CAPTION: Cybertron - what remains of it -
CAPTION: Torn asunder by one Cybertronian mad with power. Hope has become a foolish concept in the eyes of everyone. Save one.
DEFENSOR: There you are. You shouldn't be out here in the open, Prime.
OPTIMUS PRIME: You worry too much, Defensor.
DEFENSOR: Do I? Just an hour ago Storm Jet spotted Skyfire and Wind Sheer flying overhead. They know we're here.
OPTIMUS PRIME: Then you should be out there preparing the others for battle and not fretting over me!
DEFENSOR: But, sir -
OPTIMUS PRIME: No 'buts,' Defensor!
DEFENSOR: Optimus, listen! If you die, then we lose the Matrix and thus any little shred of hope we have! Without you, we are utterly helpless.
OPTIMUS PRIME: Perhaps... but only if I'm actually carrying the Matrix.
DEFENSOR: What? (Optimus beams the Matrix's energies into him) GAH! What... what did you just do?
OPTIMUS PRIME: I have passed on the Matrix of Leadership to you. If I fall in battle, it will be up to you to lead the Autobots.
DEFENSOR: But, Prime, I can't -
OPTIMUS PRIME: There is no use in arguing. What's done is done. Now go... Join Ultra Trion and the others at Base Sigma. They will be the last resort if the Decepticons defeat those here.
DEFENSOR: ...Very well. I won't let you down.
CAPTION: Meanwhile - Decepticon Fortress
WIND SHEER: I keep tellin' ya, it's a waste of time. I mean, the Autobots have been stretched thin. We've taken their combiners, we've taken their Titan... What could they possibly throw at us?
SKYFIRE: Uh, Wind Sheer.
WIND SHEER: What?
SKYFIRE: Stand erect.
WIND SHEER: Excuse me - oh.
BOTH: Hail, Lord Megazarak!
OBSIDIAN: Silence, imbeciles! Speak only when Megazarak permits you to!
MEGAZARAK: Obsidian...
OBSIDIAN: Yes, my liege?
MEGAZARAK: Shut up. Decepticons, the time for our attack has come! The Autobots have been spotted and are ripe for destruction! The plan is simple: Obsidian will lead the first wave of troops, with Devastator serving as the muscle. Then, I will arrive with Fortress Maximus (as controlled by Megabolt) and obliterate whatever is left of their base. Then I will -
DREADWIND: *Cough*
MEGAZARAK: WHO DARES INTERRUPT MY SPEECH?!
DREADWIND: Um...
SMOKEJUMPER: We have a teensy bit of a problem...
CAPTION: Autobot Camp
OPTIMUS PRIME: Gone?! What do you mean 'gone?!'
X-BRAWN: Gone as in completely: Prowl, Side Burn, Ironhide, Swerve... none of us can find them anywhere.
OPTIMUS PRIME: ...This is bad.
X-BRAWN: You're telling me?
OPTIMUS PRIME: I'm serious, X-Brawn. The Decepticons will be on us in any moment. If they didn't already outnumber us before... No. We must stand tall. For the sake of every Autobot who has fallen. We'd be doing them a disservice if we gave up now. Hot Shot, rally the remaining Spy Changers.
HOT SHOT: Right.
OPTIMUS PRIME: Grimlock, are your Dinobots ready?
GRIMLOCK: Always.
OPTIMUS PRIME: Then that settles it... (He suits up in Super Mode) Let battle be joined!
NARRATOR: But hope is not everything. (We see Megazarak punching through Optimus's chest as the Autobots are massacred) Not all miracles come true. (Megazarak is enraged at not finding the Matrix) Not all dreams are realized. But, not all lights go out. And sometimes, all one needs is a single ray of light... to illuminate their path.
SIDEWAYS: Looks like my work here is done.
Story #3: With My Own Eyes
UNIVERSE: Aurex 203.26 Zeta
Starring Refute
[this story mostly relies on visuals; basically a lot of Transformers are drawn weird, like Optimus having a mouth over his faceplate (rather than underneath it) and Hot Shot's transformation scheme not making any sense]
REFUTE: If you'd seen half the things I'd seen, you'd already be eligible for an insane asylum.
I've seen things that I know should not be possible. Things that just make me wonder 'Why is it that way?' Things that make me question the laws of the universe.
My friends say I think too much. Then again, my friends are stupid. Maybe that's why I didn't mind siding with the Decepticons. They seemed to accept things by destroying them. Maybe that's why I don't mind watching the world burn. Because in my eyes... it deserves it.
RANSACK: Come on, Refute! Let's powerlink!
SFX: Shoom!
REFUTE: Ah, here comes the Rapture.
RANSACK: What the-?
REFUTE: Just in time.
RANSACK: Holy scraplets!
OIL SLICK: Mother...
(They're all abducted by Unicron. Sideways drives up and transforms)
SIDEWAYS: Boy, do I have my work cut out for me...
Story #4: And Now For Something Completely Different
UNIVERSE: Unknown
Some universes are best left unexplored.
[so you know how Takara made TF figures based on Disney characters like Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck?]
CAPTION: Earth - but not how you remember it
TELETRAAN: Alert! Decepticon sighting! Repeat! Decepticon sighting!
MICKEY MOUSE: Let's roll, Autobots!
JAFAR: My liege, we have procured most of the energon.
PETE: Excellent work -
MICKEY MOUSE: Not so fast!
PETE: Eh? You.
MICKEY MOUSE: This ends here.
PETE: Ah, Mickey Mouse! Here to save the day once again. You won't succeed this time.
MICKEY MOUSE: At the end of this day, Pete, one shall stand and one shall fall.
PETE: Blah, blah, blah. I've heard it all before. Now then, Decepticons... attack!
MICKEY MOUSE: Autobots, roll out!
(Complete pandemonium ensues)
???: ROARRR!
QUASIMODO: Eh? What's that?
MICKEY MOUSE: It's Maleficent and her Predacons!
MALEFICENT: My Predacons! Merge into Predaking!
(The Predacons, which include Scar and Shere Khan, merge together)
PREDAKING: Prepare for extermination!
GOOFY: Garsh...
PETE: Quickly, Decepticons! Transport the energon! AUTO! Is the space bridge ready?
AUTO: Affirmative, Lord Pete.
PETE: Excellent. Soon, Cybertron shall be -- (FWOOSH!) AGH! Hades! What are you doing?
HADES: Betraying you. Dugh.
MICKEY MOUSE: Autobots! Reinforcements are incoming.
HERCULES: The Princes!
MICKEY MOUSE: Led by none other but Prince Hans himself! Boy, what a great Autobot! Would be a shame if he was actually a Decepticon, huh-huh!
HANS: I. Can't. Take. This. Anymore.
HANS/SIDEWAYS: All right, that's it! I've had enough of this ridiculous universe! I'm not an Autobot. I'm not a prince. My name isn't even Hans. It's Sideways. I'm a cross-dimensional traveler working for Unicron. I was here to abduct some of you guys, but you know what? I'm not going to. Why? Because there aren't enough Matrices of Leadership that could repel the darkest hour you would bring.
MICKEY MOUSE: Huh. And I thought Donald was hard to understand.
DONALD DUCK: Hey!
SIDEWAYS: Yeah. So I'm gonna leave now. You carry on with what you're--
ANNA: Wait! Can't you just let it go?
SIDEWAYS: They're all yours, boss.
(Everyone screams as Unicron consumes them)
FIN
CHARACTERS
Story #1
Autobots: Drift, Ratchet, Rewind
Story #2
Autobots: Defensor, Fortress Maximus, Grimlock, Hot Shot, Hound, Mirage GT, Nightcruz, Optimus Prime, Scavenger, Sideways, Sky Lynx, Ultra Trion, X-Brawn
Decepticons: Bludgeon, Devastator, Dreadwind, Megabolt, Megazarak, Obsidian, Skyfire, Smokejumper, Toxitron, Wind Sheer
Story #3
Autobots: Hot Shot, Optimus Prime, Swerve
Decepticons: Oil Slick, Ransack, Sideways
Mini-Cons: Ironhide, Perceptor, Refute, Roadhandler
Story #4
a bunch of Disney characters I don't feel like listing
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