6. WHAT HURTS THE MOST
--Six months ago--
She could deal with most kinds of pain. She had been shot at and stabbed at plenty of times during the war. But this was different.
"...And then, one time, I was heading to my locker on the Xantium, and there was this note on it, and it said, 'Now we're even.' And I was like, 'Now we're even? Huh? What?' So I opened the locker...."
She had seen many of her friends fall in combat. She had sat beside and mourned at plenty of bedsides. But this was different.
"...And this Sharkticon pounces at me! Except it's not a Sharkticon but just a shoddy replica of one on a spring. Then I look over... and those two are hiding behind a bench, snickering at me."
She had fallen in love before. But this was different.
This was worse.
Once he had calmed down from his laughter, Sandstorm said, "Yeah, I'll always remember Topspin and Twin Twist for moments like those. The Wreckers aren't quite the same without them now."
The orange Autobot bowed his head before walking off stage. Standing towards the back, Emirate Xaaron read off the next name listed on his datapad.
"Knock Out."
From the crowd of Cybertronians came a Decepticons with pristine red armor plating. He wasted no time making his way towards the stage, looking as if he had better things to do than to give an eulogy to his fallen comrades.
As he stood front and center, Knock Out let out a dramatic sigh. "Ah, yes, Runabout and Runamuck. I served with them on board the Nemesis in the last few months of the war. They were rude and obnoxious, making crude and vulgar jokes every chance they got. Tell them to go aft towards the ship's stern and they'd chuckle like morons at the word 'aft.'
"They also enjoyed partaking in vandalism, such as disabling the door controls to one's quarters, plastering walls with pinup pictures of curvaceous fembots, and spray-painting obscene words on the back of Megatron's chair (mind you, they only did that once).
"To this day, I cannot fathom why our wondrous leader selected them to serve on his flagship. My only guess is that he needed extra cannon fodder-- and obviously they fulfilled that purpose in the end. Since then, things have been a lot quieter and mundane without them... all for the better, I say. Good riddance."
With that, he strode off the stage and returned to his seat. Xaaron rolled his optics before reading the next name.
She watched as the Dinobots reminisced their old comrade Skar; as the Decepticon cassettes recalled their master Soundwave; as Getaway spoke of the Duobots; as Fulcrum eulogized Flywheels; as Shockwave and Yoketron were all remembered by those who knew them. No rhyme or reason were given to the order of the names, though everyone knew who would be saved for last.
Then, once Perceptor had finished his speech on Azimuth, they called her name.
"Livewire."
All eyes were on her now. Taking a deep breath, she rose from her seat and made it towards the stage. Once she had taken her spot before the thousands of Cybertronians watching her, she gathered all of her courage and spoke.
"Strongarm was the first friend I made at the academy, besides my brother Jolt, and all three of us were trained by Commander Halo. We were quite a tightly-knit group; you'd be hard-pressed to find us apart. Of course, High Command managed to find a way in the end.
"Strongarm was the only one of us three to make it into the Elite Guard, while Jolt and I went on to serve in separate units. Every great once in a while we'd see each other again, whether on the battlefield or during downtime, but it would never be all three of us at once."
Livewire paused for a few seconds, her spark performing somersaults in its chamber.
"The last time I saw Strongarm, it was after the Vulcanus campaign, one year before the Cataclysm. We only talked for two hours or so, since it was on the way back to Cybertron, but in that short span of time... I realized just how close we had always been. Not only was she a great friend, but... she understood me in ways no one else did, not even Jolt. There was a connection between us that I never had with anyone else."
She paused again, barely able to say the next set of words.
"After that, she remained on Cybertron while I was stationed at the Orbital Command Hub for the next hundred years. Each day that passed me by, I thought of seeing her and Jolt again and telling them both how much they meant to me. And now...." She looked sadly towards the casket that represented Strongarm. "Now I'll never get that chance."
She let those words hang in the air as she returned to her seat, her body trembling with all of the sorrow welled up within her. A mournful silence passed before Xaaron read the last name on his list.
"Optimus Prime."
Even the Decepticons present could not help but watch intently as the Autobot leader walked on stage, his expression a solemn one.
"Those of you here now no doubt who Megatron is and how he died," the Prime said. "But what he was varies between some. Monster and idol, conqueror and savior, tyrant and hero... there does not exist a single words that perfectly describes him. Even his name fails to suffice, whether he was Optronix, the valiant soldier, or Megatron, the ruthless emperor. His story truly has no equal.
"Am I here to vindicate his crimes as Megatron? No. Nor am I here to dishonor his heroics as Optronix. To tell the truth, there is no way to properly honor someone such as him without being controversial. All I can say is that, regardless of his atrocities, he was without a doubt a formidable warrior and leader for both factions. And however terrible his actions were, in the end, they changed us all for better or for worse.
"And with that, my friends, I leave you. 'Till all are one."
* * *
The funerary ceremony had ended half an hour ago, and yet Livewire still could not bear to leave Strongarm's casket. All of the things she could have said while she had the chance... all of those moments she cherished being washed away like tears in rain.
"It's the worst kind of pain, isn't it?"
Livewire turned to see a sleek, blue femme standing next to her, green visor gleaming in the light of the setting sun.
"To be so close to someone, just to have them be town away from you before you can tell them everything you wanted to say," she went on.
"You know that feeling?" Livewire asked.
"Not the same way you feel it. But I know what it's like to have your feelings left unrequited."
A silence fell over the two of them. Then, the blue femme turned to Livewire and offered her hand. "I'm Spiral, by the way. I come from Velocitron, so all of this war and death is kind of... a lot, to me."
"Livewire. And I envy you. I probably would have gone to Velocitron or somewhere if I didn't have Strongarm and Jolt. And now that she's gone and Jolt hasn't spoken to me in years...."
She sighed sadly as she returned her gaze to the casket. Spiral then reached out and gently brought her face back around to look at her.
"Hey, don't be like that," she said. "I know you miss her, but... would she want you to be grieving at her coffin all day and not enjoying the new world she and everyone else fought for?"
Livewire thought for a moment. "Well, no. No, she wouldn't. She'd want me to enjoy life now that the war's over."
"That's what I was hoping to hear." There was another lull of silence before Spiral shifted her feet. "Say, uh, Blurr's reopened Maccadam's yesterday, and my friends and I were going to head over there. Care to join us?"
For the first time in a long while, Livewire smiled. "I'd love to."
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