Star Wars Eye of Kaas: Miserable Woe, Part II

MISERABLE WOE, PART II

--Tatooine--

    Talsai Van coughed out the sand still in his mouth as he got to his feet. He looked up with baleful eyes at the retreating Meson Martinet, which was continuing to its original destination. Although he knew it would do no good, he hurled every last swear word he knew at the ship. Even if the crew had heard him, it would do nothing to make them change their minds.

    Once he had used up his colorful vocabulary, he finished off with a frustrated yell. Here he was now, stranded in the middle of the Dune Sea with only a blaster and the clothes on his back. He had no idea where or in what direction the nearest town was, and it would only be a matter of time before some herd of Tusken Raiders came across him.

    So this was it then. This was how General Merlok would meet his end. This was how Baron Salvan Tai would die. As the galaxy's greatest disgrace.

    The distant sound of a moving vehicle instantly raised the Togruta's low hopes. He turned around to see a large, rectangular shape rising from over a sand hill, treading slowly but surely in his direction.

    He grimaced. Jawas. Although he was not very fond of the little creatures that roamed the Dune Sea, they were his best bet in getting out of the fix he was in.

    Calling out to the sandcrawler, he waved the vehicle over to his position. The vehicle soon came to a stop and a ramp lowered on its starboard. A hooded Jawa stepped down from it and began to approach Talsai, yellow eyes glowing from the shadow of its hood.

    Just as Talsai realized he did not know how to speak Jawaese, the Jawa stopped before him and said, "Bazi batza bazic?"

    Talsai blinked. He couldn't decide what was more surprising: a Jawa speaking fluently in Bocce, or it asking him if he spoke Basic.

    Tentatively, he answered, "Yes."

    Nodding, the Jawa spoke in perfect Basic. "I take it you're lost?"

    Taken aback by the presence of a talking Jawa, Talsai stammered, "I... yes. Yes, I am. My crewmates dumped me out here."

    "Did they now?" the Jawa replied. "Must have had a good reason."

    "Depends on who you ask," Talsai murmured, rubbing the back of his head. "Look, if it's not too much trouble, I just need you to take me to the closest spaceport."

    "Well, that would be Mos Eisley, but I'm currently headed for Anchorhead. If you don't mind making the trip, I can drop you off there."

    "Great. I can't thank you enough. I'll make sure to pay you back once we're--"

    The Jawa shook his head. "No need. Anything for an old friend."

    Talsai stared at the Jawa in bemusement as the latter headed back for the sandcrawler. "'Old friend...?'"

    "Oh, and you can lose the Togruta disguise," the scavenger called back. "I already know who you are, Merlok."

    Talsai's face instantly lost all color. Oh, kark....

*  *  *

    "Galus, they're here."

    The ghoul-faced Givin frowned as he looked over at Galus Freetaa, fast asleep on his throne. Most of his harem had also fallen asleep, save for a human woman. Approaching her, the Givin said, "Excuse me, but could you please awaken our master?"

    The woman turned to the sleeping Galus and tugged on his sleeve. With a snort the Twi'lek awoke and he lifted his head up to stare at the Givin.

    "Nas?" Galus yawned as he sat up. "This had better be worth interrupting my nap."

    "They're here," Nasoth Alarin said.

    Galus' eyes went wide and he immediately jumped down from his throne. "They are? How long have they been here?"

    "Their ship just landed on the perimeter. They should be here right about...."

    As if on cue, a party of six entered the throne room, led by a crimson-clad man wearing a Kaleesh-styled mask. The infamous pirate of the Western Reaches strode up to Galus and bowed to the Twi'lek in a theatrical manner.

    "Fair tidings to you, Galus Freetaa," said Sidon Ithano. "I trust you are doing well?"

    Galus beamed at him. "Even more so now that you're here, Ithano. Do you have the...?"

    "Indeed I do. Quiggold?" Sidon snapped his fingers and his Gabdorin first mate waddled forward, handing him the totem. At the same time, Galus gestured Nasoth over.

    "Make sure it's authentic," the Twi'lek said to the Givin. "We wouldn't want to upset our friend Malvis."

    "Come now, Galus," Sidon said as he gave Nasoth the artifact. "Would I ever deceive you?"

    "I may trust you, Ithano, but it doesn't hurt to be careful. After all, you could have easily been tricked by the Hutts as well."

    Sidon grunted as he crossed his arms. "After all the trouble we went through getting it, I would hope that it's the real deal."

    Placing a magnifier over his right eye, Nasoth held up the totem and studied it carefully, examining every last line carved into the small, eye-bearing triangular object. After a long, pressing moment, the Givin finally lowered the magnifier.

    "It is genuine."

    Galus threw his hands up to the ceiling. "Bless Daesha's Grail! I can almost taste Malvis' reward!" Spinning on his heel, he said to an aide, "Summon Valrisa. Tell her we have the--"

    "No need." Appearing in the entrance to the throne room, Valrisa leaned against the wall. "I'm glad you were able to provide in time, Freetaa."

    Galus gawked at the masked woman, his mouth struggling to form sentences. "I -- what -- how long have you been here?!"

    "Since I last spoke with you," Valrisa replied. "I've never actually left the palace; it's a long way back to Anchorhead and I've only got so much fuel left in my speeder."

    "You mean you've been here this whole time?" Galus exclaimed, sounding increasingly agitated. "In my palace?! Unsupervised?!"

    "Yeah." Valrisa strode down casually into the chamber and walked up to Nasoth, taking the totem from his bony white hands. "Don't worry, my girlfriend's got her new toy to keep herself busy. She shouldn't mind being kept waiting. Malvis will contact you shortly to deliver your reward."

    With that, she turned on her heel and left the chamber. Galus continued to stare after her, mouth hanging open. Once Valrisa was out of sight and mind, Sidon turned back to the Twi'lek.

   "So... speaking of reward...."

*  *  *

    "One hundred and forty-eight!"

    The worrt squealed as the blaster bolt sent it flying a dozen miles. Another worrt poked its head out of its hole and earned itself a shot as well.

    "One hundred and forty-nine!"

    Typha Lorr chewed on her bottom lip as she scouted the area for another target. She just needed one more to beat her record. One more to become the best (and only) worrt sniper in the galaxy.

    Seven miles ahead, a worrt cautiously emerged from its hole to check on its companions. A pearl white grin flashed from Typha's azure face as she lined up her shot.

    The speeder she was in shook just as she pulled the trigger. The blaster bolt fired from the rifle and zipped over the worrt's head, which immediately retreated back into its hole.

    Swearing up a storm, Typha turned around to see Valrisa situating herself in the driver's seat. The masked woman spared her a glance as she buckled herself in.

    "Having fun?" she said dryly.

    Typha's gold eyes flared with anger. "You made me miss my shot!"

    Valrisa tilted her head. "And?"

    "I was on a winning streak! I was about to beat my own record!"

    "Too bad." Valrisa started up the speeder before looking back at her infuriated Pantoran partner. "You know, you're cute when you're mad."

    Typha scowled as she put her rifle away, crossing her arms and leaning back in her seat. "Shut up," she muttered.

    Valrisa simply chuckled as she accelerated the speeder in the direction of Anchorhead.

Star Wars Eye of Kaas: Miserable Woe, Part I

Will be taking a break from Regenerated for a while. In the meantime, here's a little Star Wars story I wrote to tie up a few loose ends from Endgame.

MISERABLE WOE: PART I

--Teth--

    "Okay, Reeg. I'm in position."

    Trying to keep his breathing steady, Talsai Van looked over his shoulder nervously. The Hutt's goons would be here any minute now and he would be dead in seconds. He prayed that the others would get here in time.

    "Copy that," came Reeg's response. "Bringing her in now."

    Over the Tethan Mountains, Talsai could see the Meson Martinet flying towards his location. In the canopy of its top turret he could spot Reveth manning the gun, ready to blast any opposition that came their way.

    Or me, Talsai thought. He knew Reveth didn't care for him that much and would probably blast him and take his prize if the captain weren't there to stop her.

    The distant rumbling laugh of a Hutt told him that his pursuers were catching up to him now. He dared not to look behind him. He refused to give them the satisfaction of seeing his fear.

    The Meson Martinet was getting closer. In a minute it would be close enough for him to jump on and escape.

    The laughter was getting louder. Any minute now its owner would be right behind him, flanked by dozens of his thugs.

    He stared at the approaching freighter, his forehead beginning to precipitate. Come on, come on--

    "End of the line, Togruta," a booming voice came from behind. "Give it up."

    Talsai swore under his breath. Kark.

    Turning on his heel, the red-skinned Togruta came face-to-face with a massive Hutt clad in armor, accompanied by an assortment of Weequays, Gamorreans, Klatooinians, and other brutish thugs. The upper half of his face concealed by a visor, the folds of the Hutt's front creased as it formed a slimy grin.

    "I would commend you for making it this far," Vondara Ramesh said. "But to be honest, I actually allowed you get this far. Thought it would be more amusing."

    "Yeah right," Talsai retorted, trying to keep up a brave facade. "You're just saying that because you don't want to admit to your slowness"

    "Slow?" Vondara guffawed as he drew a massive vibroax. "The only thing that shall be slow will be your death."

    The sound of engines told Talsai that the Meson Martinet was right behind him. Suddenly feeling courageous, the Togruta smiled at the Hutt.

    "Tell you what: how about we time how long it takes my friends to blast you away and then see if you can do better."

    Vondara chortled. "Oh, you truly are foolish if you think I didn't come prepared for them. Rorjak?"

    One of the pug-nosed Klatooinians snorted as they raised a small device and pressed a button. Behind Vondara and his posse, the B'omarr Monastery that was the Hutt's domain burst into flames.

    Vondara cried out in shock and rage as he and his goons turned towards the unexpected explosion. Taking advantage of their distraction, Talsai turned towards the Meson Martinet and saw the ship hovering before him, its ramp lowered. Standing on the ramp was Reeg Brosna, who waved Talsai over. The Togruta did not waste any time in jumping onto the ship.

    As soon as Talsai's feet hit the deck, a Gamorrean suddenly broke away from the rest of Vondara's gang and started running towards the ship. Alarmed, Talsai moved to close the ramp only for Reeg to grab his hand. Talsai looked at the anvil-headed Arcona as if he had lost his mind.

    "What are you doing? That pig is going to--"

    Before he could finish, the Gamorrean jumped onto the ramp and landed with a loud thud, causing the freighter to rock slightly. He shot a glare at Talsai before brushing past him and Reeg. The latter closed the ramp before shouting towards the cockpit.

    "Get us out of here, Pen!"

    As the ship turned away from a very angry Vondara, the Hutt's goons fired at the freighter, only to be blasted away by Reveth with the turret. In seconds, the Meson Martinet was blasting off towards the Tethan sky.

    On board the pirate vessel, Talsai followed Reeg back to the helm, wearing a befuddled expression all the way. In the cockpit, they found the Ishi Tib Pendewqell piloting the ship, while the Gamorrean stood in the corner with his large arms crossed. Walking past the porcine brute, Reeg slapped him on the shoulder.

    "Good work, Squeaky. That one is going in the book." The Gamorrean simply made non-committing snort.

    Talsai looked quizzically between the two. "I don't understand," he murmured.

    "We don't actually have a book," Reeg said. "That's just an expression we use."

    "No, no. I mean...." Talsai gestured at the Gamorrean. "What's he doing here? Isn't he one of Vondara's goons?"

    Reeg grinned. "Oh, that's right. You're new. You've never met Squeaky before." He turned to the Gamorrean and said, "Squeaky, this is Talsai Van, our newest recruit. The captain hired him last year."

    Squeaky met Talsai's gaze momentarily before grunting in dismissal. The Togruta stared at him before turning back to Reeg.

    "I still don't understand. How long has he been with Vondara?"

    "About a year. We dropped him off on Teth just before coming to Takodana. We needed to give him enough time to make himself blend in before setting up the explosives and rewiring their defense systems."

    Talsai raised his eyebrows. "A Gamorrean did all of that?"

    "Yeah. What, you thought we left him there to twiddle his thumbs or something?"

    Before the Togruta could respond, the two were interrupted by the arrival of a crimson-clad figure. Both Talsai and Reeg stepped aside as Sidon Ithano entered the cockpit, followed closely by his stout, peg-legged first mate Quggold. Sidon walked past without a word while Quiggold stopped and looked up at Talsai.

    "You have it?" the hooded Gabdorin grunted.

    Talsai blinked. "Huh? Oh, yeah." He reached into his travel pouch and procured the totem he had taken from the Monastery. Quiggold took it before wandering over to the captain's side.

    Sidon Ithano stood by the pilot seat, his arm resting behind Pendewqell's star-shaped head. The Crimson Corsair watched silently as purple sky turned into black space. Once the Ishi Tib had put in the coordinates for their next destination and made the jump to hyperspace, Sidon turned around and leaned against the chair, crossing his arms as he stared at Talsai.

    "I'm not a very humorous man, Talsai Van."

    The Togruta swallowed, feeling his forehead sweat again. "Beg your pardon?"

    "Now I can take a joke, don't get me wrong. But only if it's funny." Sidon pointed a thumb at Squeaky. "What he just did to Vondara and his precious palace? That was funny. That made me laugh. But you?" He pointed at Talsai now. "You are not funny. I am not laughing."

    "I'm sorry, captain, but I really have no idea what you're--"

    "Yes you do. Your face says it all." Stepping away from the chair, Sidon stormed up to the Togruta and stood mere centimeters from his face. Although he could not see the Blood Buccaneer's eyes through his red plasteel mask, Talsai could still feel the pirate's cold gaze.

    "Do you want to say it to everyone?" Sidon asked, dangerously quiet. "Or should I?"

    The Togruta said nothing, unable to muster the courage to speak.

    Turning away from him, the captain said to the others, "Talsai Van died eight years ago at the hands of Black Sun. Unless he could have somehow survived being thrown into the lava pits of Mustafar, then this man is not Talsai Van. He's a two-faced swine who thinks impersonating dead people is funny."

    He looked back at the Togruta. "Do I have that right? Tell me if I missed anything."

    Talsai inhaled slowly as he glanced at the crewmembers. Reeg looked disappointed at him while Squeaky and Quiggold merely glowered. Pendewqell kept his back turned, focusing on piloting the ship.

    Letting his breath out, Talsai cast his gaze to the ground. "You left out the fact that I'm the last surviving general of the Glorian Empire."

--Tatooine--

    The giant door creaked loudly as it slowly rose from the ground. The cloaked masked figure waited patiently as it completed its ascent before stepping into the dark entryway.

    After getting past the Gamorrean guards, the figure followed the sound of music and laughter down a winding maze of corridors. Eventually they reached the palace's throne room, which was filled wall to wall with sentient beings of all sorts of shapes and sizes, all laughing and talking amongst themselves.

    Pushing past a pair of Phindians, the cloaked figure came face to face with their person of interest. Stretched upon a throne of cushions and surrounded by slave girls, a white-skinned Twi'lek male happily dropped a bunch of grapes into his mouth. Behind him, two Weequays waved palm leaves over the Twi'lek. Both of them, as well as the slaves, looked utterly miserable with themselves.

    The visitor stood before the Twi'lek, waiting for him to notice their presence. When he failed to do so, the masked figure turned their eyes to a Falleen slave. The green-skinned woman met their gaze before tugging on the Twi'lek's sleeve. The head-tailed alien raised his head to see his guest.

    "Ah!" he exclaimed, grinning as he sat up. "Valrisa! It's been too long."

    "Dispense with the pleasantries, Galus," Valrisa said coldly, folding her arms over her chest. "You know why I'm here."

    Galus' smile wavered slightly but he managed to maintain an upbeat facade. "Yes, of course! Of course I do. Why else would you be here? Fun and games? Ha ha!"

    Valrisa did not laugh. "The totem, Galus. Where is it?"

    The Twi'lek's eyes darted to a group of mercenaries standing in the alcoves of the chamber. They met his gaze with a nod before slowly moving to surround Valrisa. Galus returned his eyes to the masked woman, who did not show any indication of having witnessed the exchange.

    "It's on the way," Galus said firmly.

    "You said it would be here by dusk," Valrisa said darkly.

    "I did. I never specified when--"

    "It is unwise to keep Malvis waiting, Galus Freetaa. Those who fail to fulfill their end of the bargain pay the price."

    Galus' smile was gone now, replaced with a dark look. "It will be here. Just give them a few more hours."

    Valrisa stared at him for a long moment, eyes glaring from the spectacles of her mask. Finally, she said, "Midnight. You have until midnight."

    Galus let out his breath and nodded, smirking. "Deal. See you then."

    Nodding curtly, Valrisa turned on her heel and gestured with her hand. All at once the mercenaries started gagging, clawing at the toxic darts jutting from their throats. By the time she had left the chamber, their dead bodies already littered the floor.